the human side of kitty…

caged heart

a warm body on a dark, lonely night

not caring who he is and that this doesn’t feel right

in the darkness I can’t see, I barely open my eyes

as a hand reaches out to touch me, this is my demise

how did I arrive here, to find myself in this place

just the other day I felt loved, now nothing but disgrace

these arms, they are not a comfort, his hands they feel all wrong

as they move across my body, clearly where they don’t belong

hurt and all alone, it’s my heart that’s crying out

the words they won’t come to my lips, yet give a silent shout

why wasn’t I all you ever needed, I ask the question again

dread and fear wash over, as he pushes himself within

tears begin to spill out, this is not the lady I want to be

with a final gasp he rolls over, suddenly I’m free

regret 2

filling the deep emptiness, I am sickened by who I have become

feeling ashamed and crushed by what I have just done

wanting him to leave, quickly get out the door

needing to be alone with my sadness and feel the pain once more

it happened in an instant, almost like a dream

I drifted through the air, then my body began to scream

in total revolt, his smell it washed away

begging The Lord for His forgiveness on this dark and dreary day

a moment of pure weakness, temptation sought me out

my suffering temporarily put to ease

now my mind is full of doubt

who is this hurting girl, acting out in this way

she feels betrayed and lost but that’s no excuse today

the hot water turns colder while thoughts still linger in her mind

run these feelings through she scolds, as the tape begins to rewind

she starts to punish herself, then makes a promise to the sky

never again will she lessen her self~worth 

but rather lift herself on high

her bed that once only knew, the smell and caress of Sir

now what has she done, nothing feels or seems sure

though her body is cleansed, her mind it runs deep

regret and remorse settle in while she slowly drifts off to sleep

as the sun awakens her from rest that is so rare

it occurs to this kitty, that what seemed so real

was indeed a whore~ish nightmare

bad dream

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3 thoughts on “the human side of kitty…

  1. Ohhh suchagirl2…. You were seeking comfort, in either real life or in a dream. Something familiar. Pleasures of the flesh rarely cleanse the wounded soul.

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