Controlled into giving up. Head hangs low. Eyes closed tight. Shame abound. Body goes limp. Pride and ego shattered. Spiritually bankrupt. Hidden undercover from the world. Saturated in fear. Afraid to move. More to come. Stay down. Enemy on the prowl. Worn. Momentary.
Relinquish control. Readily available and permissible. Tolerate without resistance. Consensually suggestive. Arms stretched out. Hands open to give. Heart receives. Mind is clear. Fully trusting. Spirit enlightened. Purpose acknowledged. Promises implied then fulfilled. Unspoken surety. Honored. Protection proclaimed. Safe.
Every inch of my body weightless. Taking in a breath, a conscious effort. Exhaling needing a reminder. Two feet on the floor, one in front of the other. Eyes forward, looking up, not down. Glancing back to see how far I’ve come. Heart beat slows just to keep up its pulse. Stumble then fall. Get back up again. Trust the process. light-headed yet clear minded. Calming as still waters. A peacefulness so foreign. Soothing like a baby’s gentle touch. Drenched in comfort. Consumed with contentment. Filled with acceptance. Not an ounce of fight within.
Critical expressions meant to enrich me for betterment
Yet stand all alone when delivered in judgement…
Pursuant in romance as the beginning stage fades slowly away
To cherish my gifts renders a promise not to sway…
“You made my heart sing with energy that draws me near
A look so propelling from such a beautiful woman
my words no longer clear
Too special a creature extraordinary by any form
A body by definition sensual and warm
Those eyes incredibly piercing the deepest shade of blue
Intellectual and sexy a lady all the way through
That smile makes me tingle knowing I put it there
Breathless and provocative a treasure I’ll never share
Flirtatious sometimes teasing relentlessly so
Bringing me to my knees directionless which way to go
Offer up protection safe from any harm
Uplifting comes easy take comfort in my arm”
These simple phrases that keep me by your side
Stimulating strokes of my hair make me willing to abide
Firm strong intentions felt in Your grasp
Evoking confidence to inspire respect that will last
Gifts in kind gestures that may appear to You as trite
Unravel my heart that cries out in sheer delight
A flowering bud blossoms its petals while opening slow
Peaking in warm sunlight just beginning to grow
Soothing words offered intently with subtlety and ease
Bring over time and again my willingness to please
no matter where You are no matter how far
Your instructions are clear even when You aren’t near
this girl’s new bedtime to abide by every night
You have good reason for turning out the light
You taught me how to count the pictures in my mind
as I drift off to dreamland pleasant dreams I soon would find
grateful You care enough to take the time I need
without You it’s easy to get lost not following Your lead
as He walks into the room good girl is uttered from His lips
as Daddy finds His little girl waiting
positioned correctly slightly swaying with her hips
she knows this will please Him but more importantly it is her privilege
to be His submissive always in training
Daddy’s little girl created in His image
there once was a time in her life not so far in the past
the thought of being controlled appalled her
to the point she would nearly gasp
then He took her by surprise this Daddy came along
so gentle yet stern solid like a rock everlasting and strong
surrender and submit
she willingly let it all go
her precious gift He gladly took to design and direct
i willingly give to You…
You are my desire, my protector, my leader, my Daddy, my Sir
Your responsibilities exceed my own
my father may have planted the seed
You Daddy are the One creating me
reminding always of my need
Your direction is where my day starts
it consumes my every move especially my unsure parts
comforted and safe always assuring Your little girl
protected from all things like the oyster hiding its pearl
taking pride in the way You own me i honor solely You Sir
without Whom this kitty would never even purr
Your patience and understanding found a new extent
redefining us in ways that clearly we were meant
Your power i am blessed with training and control
only this special little girl is inspired left feeling whole
Your subtle yet stern looks and codes are secretly mine
to memorize respect and obey but never to define
a direct reflection upon You Sir a mirror image of Who You are
Your little girl depicts a perfect lady to those surrounding from afar
never would i let You down or even want to fail
my highest regard is to serve and follow You down each and every trail
Your teachings are for my highest good for You to cherish and hold
to always take what is Yours my body heart and soul laden in gold
“your beautiful gift of submission” is what allows Him to be His true reality
from the depths of His soul to the kinks of His mind my submissiveness He will find
new definitions training and tools further we travel into a world of new rules
the things He will teach me together we learn exciting excursions with each turn
submit to His every exploration His desire His commands knowing where He stands
push my limits as He protects me along the way trusting Him more with each passing day
to own me and possess every part understanding who i serve deep within my heart
never letting Him down bringing out His best shows my loyalty beyond all the rest
together we can be playful this is not a game it is a lifestyle we wish to claim
Sir brings it out of me obedient to my core i yearn for His strength as Daddy’s little whore
out in the world His signals instruct me how to behave until we get home always His little slave
never hold Him back He will lift me high honor and adore me on that i can rely
together we unleash a new level of devotion more we will discover as He pulls back the cover
How could i have ever known that “yes Sir” is all that i needed or wanted to say in return to a direct order? For a lifetime i railed against authority, especially from men. i know where it stems from and at last i have been set free from those shackles by trading them in for new ones.
Not always visible are my restraints, but i make no mistake Who is in charge and in complete control. my full respect i offer and my submission comes with ease. I asked you a question little girl, you will answer me the first time. Yes Sir. Consequences hurt, but are necessary for training. Approaching me from behind, Daddy’s hand grabs my hair, drop what i am doing as He leads me down the hall. On the bed, now. Yes Sir. On your knees, now. Yes Sir. Good girl, you do not cum until your Daddy tells you to. Yes Sir. Happy, satisfied, pleased, now finish making my lunch baby girl. Yes Sir.
Carry on with the day. Store number one, then two, Sir, didn’t You forget something at the last store? What’s that? Nevermind. (smirky grin) Do you want me to (correct you) right here in the store? No Sir! Answer Him the first time. Yes Sir. little girl is being a brat and she knew it.
to ALL things!
As a lotus is able to emerge from muddy waters un-spoilt and pure it is considered to represent a wise and spiritually enlightened quality in a person; it is representative of somebody who carries out their tasks with little concern for any reward
Red lotus; this is related to the heart, and the Lotus flower meaning is associated with that of love and compassion.
God, what is it You want me to see in this moment of Your plan? How else would You have me view it? You promised me that if You brought me to it, only You will get me through it. I hold onto Your word and have never been let down, so why would I question You now?
A hedge of protection sealed my heart like a newborn baby swaddled in a blanket. Your warmth and comfort all around me as I drove up next to his truck. I hesitated not a moment, obedient to Your direction. THIS is who You have transformed me to be today. Feeling safe and secure I exited the car, walking to the entrance, my head held high, my heart You did soften, my edges so smooth. From the other side of the pain I have been weathering, I once again could see through the eyes of my heart. Praying to let my words be few, my voice soft and gentle as I walked in the door.
He stood there at the soda machine, filling his club soda, his gaze out the window he took a small sip. Reaching up I gently rubbed his back, he turned to see who as a smile formed on my lips, a soft and gentle hello emerged from my soul. Peace washed over me in that instant and I knew it was the right thing to do.
Surprised by my sudden appearance, he reached out to give me a warm embrace. I don’t think he expected to find us in this position ever again. A little small talk to break the ice of this slightly awkward, but strangely comfortable meeting. An exchange of pleasantries, followed by a confused look that would accompany his honest statement. The assumption was that he too would be banished as I had done with my ex~husband many years before. The softened smile remained on my lips as I conveyed to him, that is not who I am today.
The truth of the matter is, I have a healing and forgiving heart now. That is a blessing that God has bestowed upon me. I do have that same compassion and kindness for the ex~husband as well. The difference is that man isn’t able to receive it for his own personal struggles.
I had to decline the offering to join him. Not that I didn’t welcome the idea, but God set the time limit as I had to pick up the baby from daycare in a few minutes. Confusion seemed to continue to wash over his face. Maybe it was more amazement of this lady standing before him with the ability to be in his presence with grace. Whatever it meant for him, it showed me just how far I have come in my faith and believe my life is divinely laid out.
As the brief conversation carried on, a few matters of importance were revealed to me and I hope some were for him as well. Was it too soon for this encounter? How could it be when God’s timing is perfectly in order. I am still very raw and emotionally attached. Perhaps deep down wanting to engage in a dialog, which I opted to reveal, I trust in the process that is ultimately bringing forth my healing. Being aware of the slippery slopes we are both capable of sliding down is half the battle. Neither of us electing to repeat a pattern of old.
Another warm embrace while savouring the simplicity yet somehow depths, of the words we shared, gave a sense of ease as I walked towards the door. Climbing back into the car, I gave a glimpse up to the truck that was carting the new motorcycle. For an instance I felt a twinge of sorrow knowing I was no longer a part of him. However, at that same moment I thought, was I really ever?
Driving down the road about a quarter of a mile, my dampened cheek reminded me, this is where we are now. His words rung in my ears, “it has to be all or nothing…” Not sure exactly what to make of that other than, I felt robbed by what he meant because I was never given that opportunity. The choice was never mine to make, but instead the decision was made for me. All I knew right then and there was, I love this man and I always will…
Once more I looked up and asked my Father,
“what is it You want me to see in all of this…?”
“Wait and trust. When the time is right, you will know, more will be revealed…”
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him,
and he will make your paths straight.