Controlled into giving up. Head hangs low. Eyes closed tight. Shame abound. Body goes limp. Pride and ego shattered. Spiritually bankrupt. Hidden undercover from the world. Saturated in fear. Afraid to move. More to come. Stay down. Enemy on the prowl. Worn. Momentary.
Relinquish control. Readily available and permissible. Tolerate without resistance. Consensually suggestive. Arms stretched out. Hands open to give. Heart receives. Mind is clear. Fully trusting. Spirit enlightened. Purpose acknowledged. Promises implied then fulfilled. Unspoken surety. Honored. Protection proclaimed. Safe.
Every inch of my body weightless. Taking in a breath, a conscious effort. Exhaling needing a reminder. Two feet on the floor, one in front of the other. Eyes forward, looking up, not down. Glancing back to see how far I’ve come. Heart beat slows just to keep up its pulse. Stumble then fall. Get back up again. Trust the process. light-headed yet clear minded. Calming as still waters. A peacefulness so foreign. Soothing like a baby’s gentle touch. Drenched in comfort. Consumed with contentment. Filled with acceptance. Not an ounce of fight within.
A kitty’s self-worth has been on trial for some time now. The defendant found guilty of constantly proving her right to be in the presence of the one she loved. Persecuted and condemned for falling short. Then humiliated, shamed, rejected and disciplined for not doing better. The daunting tasks of living up to high, unobtainable expectations placed upon her were more clear from the drive behind them. Somehow the plaintiff’s own bad behavior was supposed to be condoned according to her former Sir.
The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery;idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factionsand envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Perhaps in your mind it gave you permission to string this kitty along by keeping her guessing and wondering what was wrong with her. The lie is, she wasn’t everything you ever needed. The truth is, she was more than you ever deserved. Where was your trial, condemnation and judgement? I have the easy answer to these, they didn’t exist. I never had a judgement police uniform on that gave me the right to convict you of wrongdoings. Why? Because my offerings came with unconditional love. Now I ask, where is your salvation and redemption? Do you know who your Redeemer is? “So sad, poor thing”…
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
All the gains from this treacherous world amount to nothing if you are not seeking the One that holds the treasures and blessings to an abundant and wholesome life of fulfillment. Because you subscribe to the manosphere’s insidious notions to “fuck as much pussy as possible”, your fate and destiny have been sealed for making a pact with the evil one.
1 John 2:15-17
Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father is not in them.For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.
Aside from the fact that is the behavior and mentality of a 20 or even 30-year-old, at your age doll, you pretty well created the recipe for alone~ness. You WILL end up being that man sitting at what once was our table at the Hong Kong, by yourself. You had every part of me from the beginning to the end. The problem was, you were too terrified of falling under the trap of oneitis and that trance kept you from the best thing that could have ever happened to you and for you. “So sad, poor thing”…
But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit.Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.
B(asic) I(nstructions) B(efore) L (eaving) E (arth)