submissively struggling though obedience is abound…

Actively participating in a submissive’s own life, apart from and separate to that of its Master/Dominant/Owner. Is this even possible or desirable? Because it is absolutely necessary for us to grow. 

How long have i secretly been imposing, possibly unknowingly and complacently hiding behind The Master’s needs while placing my own responsibilities aside in order to fulfill His completely and efficiently? Did He ask or expect me to in this manner of unmitigated self sacrifice? On the contrary, He expects nothing less than perfectibility on my part for the areas that enrich and help me grow towards self sufficiency, but at the same time to make His life easier in doing so. Otherwise, i am nothing more than a doormat dormant little leach waiting for everyone else, especially The Master, to handle decisions and completely oversee to the entirety of my life. Perhaps this is protocol in other D/s, D/lg, D/bg or M/s relationships, but not ours. It is a requirement that this lg/bg/s/s (yes, we have an established variety that works well for us) attends to the nature of seeing to it that independently, i can thrive. 
Today is a day of which struggle has been a continuous measure between my fear and faith. Within the discomfort, i find strength because i know as i fumble along and take initiative, i will find the direction of my personal purpose. Whereas,
if i wait stagnant with merely good intentions, ultimately i will suffer. 
True to all healthy arrangements in a partnership of any calling, neither respect nor adoration can be obtained let alone be sustained in the absence of self love and sufficiency to some degree, one would assume. 
So again, i remind myself to; 1. ask the question 2. receive the truth 3. remove the fear
Why have i been complacent?
Because i’ve wanted to be completely available to The Master’s disposal for His every need in the moment of His orders.
Is this our arrangement?
Yes Sir of course, but not at the expense of self sabotage or failure.
Are you being successful within our established agreement?
Yes Sir, so it is i that needs to look at my own actions and fears.
Thank You Master for understanding with a gracious, loving heart.
There it is, the truth beyond measure. Activate my faith with fire in my belly. Balance will come when the process is trusted for my higher good. Believe that i am worthy to receive and all things will fall naturally in to its divine place and order. 
and this is why…
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structure and consistency…

no matter where You are no matter how far

Your instructions are clear even when You aren’t near

this girl’s new bedtime to abide by every night

You have good reason for turning out the light

You taught me how to count the pictures in my mind

as I drift off to dreamland pleasant dreams I soon would find

grateful You care enough to take the time I need

without You it’s easy to get lost not following Your lead

random things that make this lg say, yum and hmm…

Fear has no place in our world as it can be cunning and this lg finds herself in an internal battle that she loses each and every time. Trusting that Daddy knows me better than i know myself is astounding. He listens and takes things into consideration, but i understand it is ultimately up to Him while my input is noted.

Squirms under His control, knowing full well i am secure, i endure, wanting this to escalate as the pain turns to pleasure, the wetness giving away my sin~cerity, Daddy persists, silencing my wincing, covering my mouth, kisses follow, i relax, He continues…

morning sex

The aroma of the mixed con”cock”tions from our juices left over from the evening before were potent as Daddy awoke His little girl’s senses once more in the wee hours of the morning. Gentle tugs on His now sore nipples from being well used, joined together with His big firm hands that engulf His tits while intertwining His strong legs with hers. As the intoxicating scent exhumed from beneath the covers this little girl is instantly aroused, soaked, wanting her Daddy with such desire. Daddy’s moans reveal the same as He finds His wetness yet again. “Good girl, just the way I like to find my kitty” as He begins to slide up and down, His cock hardening all over again…

Pushing this lg’s limits, Daddy satisfies His wants by taking what is His while fulfilling our fantasies as our bodies and souls connect deeper than imaginable. Moving beyond the touches of skin, erotic moans that fill the air and arousal that comes with a simple graze of His fingertips across His little girl’s body. His words accompanied with “baby” or “little girl” create an eagerness to please and serve Him always in all ways…

Training His girl in ways that used to merely spark His imagination have been brought to life. Creating an even safer place where vulnerability is embraced and caressed, this lg’s submission is becoming more intense. Daddy has added new toys to the nearly full box now. Additions to the family that Daddy had only envisioned until recently.  The reception from His girl has pleased Him beyond what His lg believes He’s ever dreamed possible. Well…

Daddy’s invasion of His little girl’s mind is a constant as is her submission to Him. His ability to continually keep control is a powerful gift bestowed upon this beauty of a Man that i am learning can be wearing on Him at times. Respectfully i share, “Daddy, in a sense i am training You as well, don’t You think? By training i mean, You are letting me do more for You than before Sir”. “Mmm hmm yes little girl, I can see that”, now all she wants is to suck her “thumb”…

Together we are learning as we evolve further into our DD/lg lifestyle. 

 

 

 

 

my life, my world, my choice, my love, my happiness…

there are many layers to this little girl

depths upon depths to her caring soul

capacities to reach, a purpose to fill

all in all sharing love is her ultimate goal

If it’s on my heart, it is going to find its way to my head, pass through a filter and exit through my soft-spoken lips in the form of gentle words. My truth, my fears, my feelings, my soul, raw, naked and revealed.

I ran into a dear old friend today. Our paths haven’t crossed in months. Albeit, I take full responsibility for this as my life has been evolving and taking on new directions, but it was abundantly clear (pointed out to me) that my lack of presence has been acutely noticed and severely missed. “Where have you been?!” were the first exclamatory words tossed my way. A smile emerging from the turned up corners of my mouth. “Oh, you know how life can be, always in session. (giggling to myself at the meaning of that word) It can be incredibly busy as it heads off down several avenues, sparkling with a new adventure around each corner “. An evil yet warm grin came back to me, “Yes well, you are not allowed to just disappear on me. I need you!”  (((hugs))) We are suchgirls2!

A divine appointment? Indeed. We began to bring each other up to speed on what has transpired in her life and the transitions occurring in my own. In the brief period of time we had, we managed to cover a lot of territory and still had air left in our lungs. A bite to eat, shopping and girl talk was exactly what the Good Lord ordered.  As we walked along the sidewalk, another gal pal of ours crossed our paths. It was as if the universe had laid a golden path of estrogen to replenish us and tie our souls together once again.  I simply looked up, smiled with grace, peace and love in my heart while giving praise to the One Who planned this.

It is abundantly clear in these times that my spiritual plane is defined and directed. A greater understanding of what my purpose is. My course is set and I am on track. I am His little girl beautifully and wonderfully made. My Daddy Sir creating me as His own while His lady continues to blossom and unfold before His very eyes.

I am needed, I am missed

I am loved, I do matter, I do exist

I need not fear

for I am loved the message is clear   

My heart overflowing  with love I never knew I could spare

but rather mass-produced with plenty to share…  

in Your presence, Your arms, Your heart…

the day will come when water sinks low

to the bottom of the earth but the wind will still blow

like the pain from the past electrified and true

the subtle fresh daylight shines warmly making anew

this life we’ve encountered a style You unburied from inside

has taken us so deep wrapped up safely for me to hide

this goes beyond under the covers from the blanket You do swaddle me

the plans You have set forth are unveiling surely setting us both free

Sir You always excite me with every ounce of energy surging through my core

my heart races for You my Daddy whom i so adore

never did this little girl dream of these possibilities

that love honor and devotion could bring me to my knees

not caring of others thoughts judgments or opinions this is who i chose to portray

willingly give all of myself to You Sir the only Man i truly obey

gracious is my soul with every inch of my body You take

far beyond measure more than sexual desire and lust the perfect sub You make

with deep passion love and patience a wonderful Daddy depicting His sturdy frame

Your little girl simply melts in Your arms having only You to blame

serving You Sir is a blessing to always give and please

showing my loyalty to You alone putting Your heart at ease

as You give back to me what i never really had or found

a lifetime of missed opportunities You push me harder so my feet can leave the ground

maybe others cannot understand the depths where this can lead

perhaps because many of them won’t allow their hearts to bleed

the escape as it pours out manages my inner commotion

but Daddy it’s only You that comforts and soothes my every emotion

 

 

 

 

surrender & submit not direct & design…

as He walks into the room good girl is uttered from His lips

as Daddy finds His little girl waiting

positioned correctly slightly swaying with her hips

she knows this will please Him but more importantly it is her privilege

to be His submissive always in training

Daddy’s little girl created in His image

there once was a time in her life not so far in the past

the thought of being controlled appalled her

to the point she would nearly gasp  

then He took her by surprise this Daddy came along

so gentle yet stern solid like a rock everlasting and strong 

surrender and submit 

she willingly let it all go 

her precious gift He gladly took to design and direct

in so deep…

trusting You to hold gently in Your hands

knowing what it’s been through realizing where it stands

Your loving ways caress me deeply filling Your little girl’s void 

taking extra care always willing to prevent it from being destroyed

Daddy Sir, You are a rare and special entity

blessing Your girl daily with everything that is meant to be

both of us so deserving the gifts we give to one another

longing for what we share intensely craving each other

mere thoughts of you make my heart begin to pound

unraveling like a spool of thread falling to the ground 

she needs to feel needed, used and adored…

please do not suppress my desire to serve You no matter the cost

by doing the things that You have commanded

it confuses me and i feel lost

assure me with Your strength control and power

consistency always running through

like a bird on a ledge of the steepest tower

i belong to You Daddy Yours and Yours alone

no other could measure up

nor claim me as His very own

 

 

one big mistake can cause a back up…

it is not something i ever forget

 for if i do it is the highest infraction with the largest penalty

“Daddy may i cum”? essentially a simple request each and every time

“So what happened little girl”?

They were one on top of the other

like a loose cannon, one escaped without permission

“noooo, i’m sorry Daddy…i didn’t mean to…”

“too late baby girl”

in the toy box for safe keeping until you earn it back 

massager

until then…

Daddy has allowed me opportunities and i am committed to succeeding

meanwhile this…